Broken Worlds Read online

  Talking with Ellis earlier today eased my worries. There’s something about him, a quality he possesses, that makes me believe in him. Like when he holds my hand. Instead of freezing up, as I normally did whenever a guy touched me, I feel calm. But in his absence, my worries, which I thought I had reconciled, return. It’s as if I only feel okay about this situation when Ellis is physically present. Why have I become so fickle? My belief in his character constantly wavers. I move to the window and pull back the curtains, expecting to see Ellis charging back to the house, armed with some weapon to harm me. But instead, I see him leaning against his car, a phone pressed to his ear.

  I tug up at the window. It’s painted shut. His head turns to the house, and I duck behind the curtain. Did he see me? I rush back to the sofa, my throat dry. Even though I am staring at the door, expecting his arrival, I gasp when he returns.

  “Sorry, didn’t mean to startle you.”

  “You didn’t,” I lie. I lean back into the sofa. “You know, I don’t think I ever thanked you for saving my life. How does one thank someone for that?”

  “Well, you’re very welcome. I’m glad I was there to help.” He appraises me skeptically. “Kalli, we don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to, but I was just wondering about, you know, ‘the break’ you’re taking from your family. Has it been a long time?”

  My stomach tightens, and I grind my fingernails into my palms.

  “Um.” I have no idea how to respond. Delving into my home life and the reasons I left are not my favorite topics. I clasp my hands around my knees, making myself smaller.

  “Don’t worry about it. I shouldn’t have asked,” he apologizes.

  “No, it’s okay. I just haven’t talked about it with anyone other than Mim.”

  “Mim?”

  “Yeah, she’s a friend,” I say, fidgeting with my hands.

  He holds my hands between his, quieting my fingers. “Kalli, it’s really okay. You don’t have to tell me anything you don’t want to.” But the cuts on his face say the opposite.

  “I’m really sorry about your face” I say.

  “Don’t even think about it. Considering what you must have been going through—what I put you through—this is nothing. It makes me so angry to think of anyone hurting women. Of hurting you.”

  One of the cats rubs up against his legs, and he immediately scoops it up.

  “Some people are sick.” Ellis holds the cat close to his chest, and the air fills with the rumble of purring. “Several months ago, I was driving, and I saw this guy beating a bag with a stick. I don’t know why, but I pulled over. As soon as I got out, he took off.” He shakes his head. “Gutless ass. Getting his kicks by bludgeoning two kittens.”

  “That’s terrible,” is all I can manage to say.

  He smiles. “But they’re okay now. Aren’t you, Lucy?” He plops the cat down between us, and she immediately nestles in his lap.

  Isn’t there a saying about judging people based on the way they treat animals? Ellis is so kind and gentle with Lucy. He must be a good person. He shifts and our legs touch. I suddenly feel so warm and relaxed. Lucy trusts him and so can I. Decent men do exist. I’ve just never had the good fortune of knowing any, until now.

  And before I change my mind, I turn to Ellis. “Actually, I would like to tell you about why I left home.”

  I lock my gaze with his glorious eyes. Yes, it will be better to tell him, at least some of it. I need to be careful so that he doesn’t think I’m weak. I won’t be his charity case. I won’t be anyone’s charity case. I take a deep breath and let my shoulders relax.

  “I left home a few months ago, just before school started,” I begin. “Things got complicated at home after my dad moved out over a year ago.”

  “Your father left you?” he asks.

  “Yeah, he’s a mechanic, and he heard about some great opportunity to relocate to Pittsburgh and open up a chain of car repair shops.”

  “Do you still see him? Do you know where he is?” Ellis asks.

  I nod. “I know where he is, but I haven’t seen him for a long time.”

  I think about the last time I saw my dad. I had been so sure he would rescue me from Sita and the men she insisted I allow into my bedroom. But of course, he didn’t.

  Tears sting the corners of my eyes. I pretend to brush back hair from my forehead and wipe them away before Ellis sees.

  “Anyway, Sita, my mother’s cousin from India, also lives at my house, and she and I didn’t get along.”

  My hands shake. I’m not ready to share this part of my past. I steady my palms, hoping Ellis hasn’t noticed. It is getting difficult to hide my emotions. Talking about it is like reliving it. I need to stop.

  “So I needed a break. And at the end of the summer, I simply left,” I say.

  He looks shocked. He doesn’t understand. How could he? I’m such a fool to believe that he would see me as brave. I didn’t tell it properly.

  Pangs of sadness tear into me. I’ve ruined this. I haven’t come off strong and independent. I’ve come off sad and angry and worthless. I’ll be back out on the streets. All my hopes disappear like an interrupted dream.

  “I’m so sorry, Kalli.”

  I shrug.

  He looks at me as if I’m another stray that he’s ended up with. I’m such an idiot. I don’t want his pity. I figure it’s better if I initiate the goodbye than if he does it. At least this way, I retain some dignity.

  “Well, thanks for everything,” I say in an unnaturally high voice, staggering to my feet.

  “What? You’re leaving?”

  “Yeah. I should go. Should let you get to … well, whatever.” I laugh nervously.

  “No. You don’t have to go. Margaret’s great and all, but you were hurt badly. Why don’t you just lie down for a while, and then we can decide what to do.”

  “You still want me to stay?”

  He stands up and brushes a strand of hair from my face. “Yes, I still want you to stay.”

  “Well, I guess I’m feeling a bit tired.” I rub my eyes.

  “Okay, I’ll show you where you can rest.” He starts to get up but then suddenly freezes. His face tenses.

  “Ellis?”

  Nothing.

  “Ellis?” It comes out like a squeak, but this time he turns and looks at me.

  “Right, let’s go.” His words come out in a burst, and his mouth is tight.

  He grabs my arm and roughly ushers me along. I pull back from the unexpected pain.

  “Sorry, Kalli. You go and get some rest. I just need to take care of something.”

  Take care of something? Now? I stand rooted to the spot.

  There’s a loud bang on the front door. Ellis looks strained and my muscles tense in response.

  “Kalli, it’s fine. Go lie down. I’ll deal with this and be right back.”

  And then it finally makes sense. The phone call he made outside by his car. He was calling his girlfriend. Now she’s on the other side of the door. How can I have been so stupid to even think that he could ever care about me like that? He’s shown no indication of any feelings other than worry for my well-being. He likes to help. He helped me just like he helped the cats. Nothing more.

  “You know, actually, I’m going to get going.” I move as quickly as I can to retrieve my backpack. I blink away the tears that threaten to fall onto my cheeks. I won’t let him see me cry.

  “Did you say you were going somewhere? I don’t think so,” says a familiar voice.

  My hands immediately clench. I turn, and blocking the entire doorway, is Fallon.

  CHAPTER 6

  Though my contact with Fallon has been minimal, seeing him blocking the door fills me with panic. Fallon looks like a mammoth. His body is taking up more than its fair share of space.

  “Get out, Fallon.” Ellis crosses in front of Fallon to prevent him from getting farther inside.

  “I’m not going anywhere. Looks like I got here just in time,” he says, a
nd shoves Ellis aside. He steps toward me. “Did I hear you say you’re leaving?”

  My legs won’t move. They feel heavy like something is holding them from beneath the floor.

  “Fallon, what do you think you’re doing?” Ellis demands.

  “A house call. Isn’t that nice of me?” Fallon spits out each word.

  “It’s all fine.” Ellis’s lips are barely moving.

  “Oh, really? Have you seen yourself in a mirror lately? It doesn’t look like everything is fine to me.” Fallon moves closer.

  Ellis grabs him, struggling to hold him back. I am dumb with fear. Frozen to the spot. No. I won’t be a victim again. I search the room, my eyes wide. There has to be another way out.

  Fallon easily pulls away from Ellis and edges closer toward me. The hairs on my neck stand straight up. My breath comes up in shallow bursts. I head for the bathroom. A closed door is better than nothing. I’m only a couple of feet from the threshold when I hear Margaret’s voice.

  “This is ridiculous. Ellis, move aside. I don’t have time for this nonsense.”

  “This wasn’t expected, Margaret. I didn’t know you were coming,” Ellis says.

  “Well, I am here now, and I need to check Kalli’s stomach and make sure it is healing as it should be.”

  “You said she should come back in a week. It hasn’t even been a day.”

  “I am perfectly aware of how much time has passed. I certainly hope you are not questioning my judgment, Ellis.” The sound of her staccato voice tightens my stomach into a hard ball. I’m practically inside the bathroom.

  “Kalli?” Margaret calls out to me.

  I stand frozen, fingers touching the doorknob.

  “Kalli,” she commands.

  I have no choice. I turn and face her.

  “It’s fine.” My throat is thick, and my words are lost inside. I swallow, but my throat still feels blocked. “My stomach is fine,” I say a bit louder.

  She glares at me, her face frosty.

  “I believe I am more capable at drawing such a conclusion.” Margaret sounds annoyed. “I do not have much time,” she continues. “Come here and let me have a look. If that wound gets infected, it will spread throughout your entire body. Is that what you want?”

  “Did you discover a problem after we left? Did something abnormal show up on a scan or X-ray?” Ellis asks.

  Margaret exhales deliberately. “Yes, there was something I noticed while reviewing one of the diagnostic tests I performed.”

  My heart rate quickens. She found something?

  Ellis walks over and takes my hand. The instant I feel his skin against mine, a warm calm spreads inside me.

  “It’s better to make sure you’re okay.” He leads me back to the sofa.

  “Ellis, honestly,” Margaret says irritably, as she walks to the sofa. “We need to move this along. Kalli, come here, and I will have a look.”

  We walk by Fallon, who is still crowding the door. I’m not sure how exposed I am going to be when Margaret examines me, and I certainly don’t like the idea of Fallon being so close. I lie on the sofa, still holding onto Ellis’s hand. Margaret shakes her head. She obviously thinks I’m being silly, but I don’t care. The feel of my fingers intertwined with his is the only thing that keeps me from bolting onto the street.

  Margaret pulls up my shirt, thankfully revealing very little of my body. The exam is quick. She feels my stomach with her hands and then uses an instrument that resembles a paint roller on one end and a funnel on the other. As the roller paves across my abdomen, Margaret looks into the funnel.

  “Yes, everything is proceeding as it should be. Just make sure you keep putting on the cream to prevent any infection,” Margaret says briskly. She bends over and places her instruments into a black bag. “What happened to your face, Ellis?” She gets to her feet, pulling the bag over her shoulder.

  “Nothing. Bumped up against something. Wasn’t watching where I was going,” he says, covering the side of his mouth with the back of his hand.

  “Well, I suggest you be more careful.” Her eyes linger on Ellis and then she turns to me. “I will need to see you for a follow-up in a week.”

  “Another follow-up? I really appreciate your concern and that you actually came out to see me, but I can just go see my own doctor.”

  Her eyes narrow. “Can you really?”

  “Yes, of course,” I say, sitting up, still holding Ellis’s hand.

  She laughs and then stops abruptly. “Kalli, stop playing this game.”

  “Margaret, what are you doing?” Ellis says, his voice higher than usual. His fingers tense around mine.

  “I agree with Margaret. Let’s stop playing this game and move on to a better one.” Fallon smiles.

  “Fallon, get out!” Ellis yells.

  Margaret carries on as if there hasn’t been an interruption. “Now we all know that the information you filled out on the chart at the hospital was false. The address and phone number are completely fictitious.” She pauses and stares at me accusingly.

  My mouth is dry.

  “As I said,” she continues, “I am not legally bound to report you to the authorities, but I do feel a moral obligation to make sure your wound heals properly, and if you are not going to let me follow up, then …?” She glares at me, as if she is challenging me to call her on her threat.

  “Margaret! Stop it. What are you doing?” Ellis demands.

  I am a fool. I look at him, shocked and hurt. I yank my hand free from his. “You told her?”

  “No. Of course I didn’t.” Ellis glares at Margaret.

  Margaret looks amused as she nudges him out of the way and puts herself beside me.

  “You think we need Ellis to tell us about you?” Margaret asks. “We check all information that patients provide when we enter it into our system, and yours was invalid. Once you entered my clinic, you became my patient, and I am obligated to provide you with the best medical care I can. So you can either allow me to provide this personally, or I can call the necessary authorities and let them see to your care.”

  I’m trapped. She knows I’ve left home. Of course she knows. Who else would go to a free clinic? People who can’t afford to pay. Runaways. Me. I can’t let her call the police. I can’t go back home.

  My legs tremble as I try to figure my way out of this. She said one week. I can disappear in less than a week.

  “Okay, I’ll come back to your clinic to get rechecked,” I lie.

  I feel her icy eyes boring into me, like she’s trying to figure out if I am lying.

  “Good. I thought you would see that was the best way to go,” she says, with a note of warning in her voice. “And, in the mean time, you will remain here with Ellis. I am sure that is agreeable to you.” She crosses her arms looking smug.

  What did Margaret just say? She’s telling me that I have to stay with Ellis? It’s not her decision. I look up at him. Of course staying here would be amazing. A week of warmth. A week of sleeping on something soft. A week of delicious meals. I could rest and regain my strength.

  And having a little more time with Ellis, well, that would be…. But I could never ask this of him.

  “No, that’s not fair to Ellis. I’ll come back to your clinic, I promise.”

  “There is no choice here, Kalli,” she scolds. “If I can’t be certain that you will be properly taken care of and that you will be coming for a follow-up, I will have to call the police.” She brushes past Ellis toward the front door. A cat’s meow momentarily pulls away her attention, but she quickly regains her train of thought. “It would be irresponsible of me to do anything else.”

  “You’re right. It’s not fair to ask Ellis,” Fallon says. “You’ll stay with me. I’ll keep a very close eye on you.” He crosses his enormous arms across his chest, as mine fall limp by my side.

  “It looks like you do have a choice after all. Ellis or Fallon. You pick,” Margaret says.

  I want to scream. This isn’t right. Margaret h
as no right to make me choose. Going with Fallon is no different than going back home. Either way, I’d rather be dead. But Ellis? A part of me still believes he is my angel, and even though I know it’s too much to hope for, I do want to stay with him. But why would he want me? He doesn’t even know me. Everyone who was supposed to protect me didn’t. Why should he be the exception? I search his eyes hoping to find the answer. And I do, when he speaks.

  “Kalli, I’d like you stay here with me.” Ellis reaches down and takes my hand again, grounding me with the warmth of his touch. “I’ll take you to the clinic in a week. I want to help. It’s important to make sure you’re okay.”

  His hand surrounds mine, and I don’t pull away. It’s not threatening. It’s protective. He is the exception.

  “Thank you. I’ll stay.”

  Fallon mutters under his breath.

  “All right, now that that is settled, I will see you in one week,” Margaret says sharply.

  Before she leaves, she restates the importance of the medicated cream. Fallon doesn’t move. He simply stands by the door, arms crossed, staring at me. His eyes bore into my stomach.

  “We’re done, Fallon. Time for you to go.” Ellis holds the door open.

  “Are you sure you can handle this, Ellis? Considering your last mess-up, I think I better hang around and help.”

  “We don’t need your help.”

  They stare at each other, neither one wavering.

  “Fallon!” Margaret orders from outside.

  “Don’t worry, Kalli. I’ll make sure you heal up just right,” Fallon hisses and then turns, slamming the door shut behind him.

  CHAPTER 7

  Within seconds of Margaret and Fallon leaving, my muscles ease and my fingers loosen.

  “Are you okay?” Ellis locks the front door.

  “Yeah, I’m okay.”

  “I had no idea that was part of the treatment. I’m really sorry,” he says.

  I shake out my arms and legs, and stand up. I don’t want to spend any more time talking about Margaret and Fallon. I’ve already decided I’ll never let them near me again. I have one week to sort it all out.